Anyone have the number for Simon Cowell?

The Super Laundress. Hamper Swap. Win, Spin or Dry.
I'm not sure yet what the title will be, but I think I've come up with the next great idea in reality television.

So many women I know have trouble with laundry. They complain about it. They feel like they're always doing it. They're never on top of it. They hate it.

I'm just the opposite. Well, I guess I don't love it, but I don't feel like it runs (or ruins) my life. I've got a plan and I stick with it. I only do laundry once a week, and then it's done.

Last week I was saying to Damon that I ought to teach a class on laundry. I could teach a class where I could share my systems and my expertise, my positive mental attitude about handling the dirty clothes we accumulate each week. I could teach a class at church, or--heck!--the local community college.

So, I was on this wave of laundress largesse the other day when I had an extended conversation with a friend who was, of course, feeling overwhelmed by her laundry. "I can help!" I declared. I told her how I just do my laundry once a week and that she, too, could be liberated from her piles of dirty clothes if she could just adopt a plan and stay dedicated to it. She has twice the number of children as me and scoffed at the notion that anyone with a family of 8 could possibly keep up on their laundry. I persisted. "After school starts, we'll pick a day and get you all caught up on your laundry. We'll bring some of it to my house. We'll wash. We'll spin. We'll dry. And then from there, you'll be set! You can do this!" I crowed. (I later learned she hung up with me and told her teenage daughter that I'm crazy.)

From there it was a simple step to realizing that merely teaching a class wouldn't cut it. I would need to be like the Super Nanny or that TLC show Clean Sweep that comes right into someone's home and turns everything around through a multi-day immersion in the dysfunctional home. I think HGTV would be a great market for So You Think You Can Fold.

My mother, of course, would be my co-host, because she taught me everything I know. Like some grade schooler being asked about their academic successes, she always said, "Laundry is my best subject." We would be a formidable, stain-busting team.

So, if anyone can hook me up with a reality TV producer, I would be much obliged. And, if you're having trouble with your laundry, just let me know. You can be on our first episode.

Final Note: My mom and I believe in ironing, too, so the inevitable spin-off: As the Iron Presses.